Charlotte Eriksson

But I was young
and didn’t know better
and someone should have told me to capture every second
every kiss & every night
Because now I’m sitting here alone and it’s getting really hard to breath because tears are growing in my throat and they want to break out, but there are people
watching
and I just want to be somewhere silent
somewhere still
But still I don’t want to be alone because I’m scared and lonely
and I don’t understand
Because I was alone my whole life
My whole life
I was so damn lonely and I was content with that
because I liked myself and my own company 
and I didn’t need anyone
I thought
But then there was you .. ...

So, someone should have told me that love is for those few brave who can handle the unbearable emptiness,
the unbearable guilt and lack of oneself,
Because I lost myself to someone I love
and I might get myself back one day
but it will take time, it will take time.

This is gonna take some time.

I wish someone would have told me this.
Someone should have told me this.

When no longer..

Only these eyes can see in the dark. Where everything is still and quiet that even we fear to speak. But the shadows still play with rays of light that escaped from under, making it a little less scary. In the deepest dark, something beats in a slow unforgetable rhythm. What could it be? Coming from deepest darkest parts of this place. Up above, or down under, to the right, left? Sound that fills this void, but where is it coming from? 
Arms reach to get something from out of under. Hidden in the ashes, only these eyes could find. Oh, my heart. Would you accept it in this state that it is? All dark and burned out, but into ashes you can see some tiny parts of it beating, still pure, still alive and strugling. That is all I can offer, all the beautiful parts are gone.
Although, sometimes darkness can be the most beautiful thing in this world. So if even shadows can learn to dance with light, would you dare to take care of my heart?

I feel like a trapped cat in a box

I own nothing.
Everything just comes and goes.And when I can't anymore I come here for retreat.
I own nothing, but these words. 

I just need to hear you

With me you get what you get. I stay true to things that I believe in. 
Take it or leave it.
Hello :)
Hello *look away*
Hello *walk away*
I dare you, to try me, see who am I, what makes my fire keep burning in the darkness I drag with me.
Find out what stones and wires I am made off. What jewels you could make of me, what I could draw into you.
If you scare yourself away you might never know. And it is always better to try and know for sure, than to leave and wonder if this had any tommorow.
With me you get what you get.
Hello :) *deep, deep voice echoes in my mind*
Hello *look away, I'm scared*
Hello *can't wait to see you tommorow*

We are we going with this?

Are you there yet? Are you there yet? 

Stop asking please will you. One of the highest pleasures is not about destination, but the journey you make to get there. I want to enjoy every second, minute or hour that we do. Feel the tenderness and naive akwardness off all this. Every stroke, every small move we make. Simplicity, that makes everything so complicated. Every breath, and every arch, every part that touches one another. And we know we can't have this forever, not even for a single day. 

So why not make this second, minute or hour count? Stop with these useless questions, worries and apologies. It's not about our final destination. It's about how we choose to get there while enjoying this extraordinary pleasure.