The words stay silent in my mind, they do not want to roll on my tongue, to tell you truth on how I really feel.
How am I supposed to?
Trust myself? Has even any single thing been real in my life. And what if all of this is just another fleeting feeling that will pass after a while, once too many goodbyes have been said. Who was I supposed to trusts, when I could not even trust myself after all this time. You know time was the only thing that was not fleeting, it was dragging. Keeping me waiting, looking ahead, false hope breathing.
But maybe the words do not matter anymore. Maybe it was just another small moment to remind me of all good things that I cannot have. Of hugs that have been kept locked away from me. Of kisses never received. And just me, forgotten in a way. Left to fend myself, when I dont even know how.
All these maybes in my wild mind, ups and downs in middle of all the chaos. Never enough certainty.
So what am I supposed to be?
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