Maybe, one day, soon, wait

I am made out of thousand pieces of all the broken times.
All the lone diners.
All the quiet times.
All the times I had something to say, but noone to hear.
All the kisses that I have wished for.
All the blank stares in darkness.
All the days when world tried to collapse on my shoulders, but I had to hold it steady still.
All the days when I had forgoten what it feels to be in an embrace warm.
All the times I have searched for other eyes to meet mine, only to feel invisible.
All the broken things that I have stitched together with tape and glue, just to give it a little bit more time.
All the nights when I have danced on my own.
All the wishes wished, that I knew would go on wasted.
All the times when the only voice in the room has been my own.
All the healing I had to find on my own.
All the times when I was ready to leave and never come back.
All the days I needed to share these burdens with someone, only to be told they do not have the mental space for me.
All the times I tried to tell myself that soon...soon..so soon everything will turn around.
All the days when I had lost the last of hope.
All the times I have felt wortless.
Just a thousand little broken things, stitched together with sticky tears and fears.
Just giving it a little bit more time..just..a little bit more time.
But what if there is not that much time left? What if this is the only way I will ever get to experience my life? Would that even be the scariest things of all, if everything I used to fear, has already taken over my life. So all I can do is stare in darkness silently and feel like I am right where others are not meant to be amidst the thousand broken things - that is me.